I was thinking last night… maybe it's the butter.
I do like butter quite a bit… maybe a little bit too much? Maybe I'm addicted to butter? As I've found that foods which are somewhat addictive to me, are usually not good for me, maybe butter is one of those.
So… instead of lavishing butter on my dinner… I thought… I'll be conservative.
And guess what? I was up hungry in the middle of the night. Doggone it! And then today I was obsessing about food, and ending up cheating. Well, you know, it wasn't that bad of a cheat. I only had one advanced food. Everything else was GAPS legal. I haven't had any fruit since the 8th of April, and today I had three grapes. Then I wanted some of my snackie/candy treat that I haven't had for weeks and weeks… a teaspoon or two of peanut butter [affiliate link], a tiny glob of honey [affiliate link], some butter and a dash of cacao powder. Oh, that's right, I did have some coconut flakes [affiliate link], which are definitely farther along than intro.
I did manage to get my two chickens that I roasted yesterday, deboned and into a pot to make stock this afternoon, because I'm completely out of soup.
Actually, I'm not completely out of soup, but I messed up my last batch of soup with the brilliant idea to put 1 1/2 cups of acorn squash (blended) into my soup. It just tasted way too sweet, and it seemed to bother me, blood sugar-wise. So I need to blend up the entire batch and freeze it for eating at a future time.
I steamed some cauliflower and zucchini squash and carrots and had those today, with plenty of butter, and felt much better in terms of feeling satisfied.
The thing is, I am starting to think that butter is making the food taste so yummy that maybe I'm eating too much.
This is such a puzzle, and I wish I wasn't confused by it all.
And now it is almost 7pm and I need to get going with dinner so I can get to bed at a decent time tonight.
I am also really messed up with my sleeping.
For years, literally decades now, I have relied on naps to get enough sleep. Now I have heard from two different sources that naps are not good for us. They cause our body to do things that should only happen when it is dark and night time. So yesterday I did not take a nap, and I got into bed at 8pm, but then my husband didn't get in until midnight or 1 o'clock, who knows what time it was and that woke me up and I was awake for a while. Not to mention that I did not get to sleep at 8pm, even though I was in bed, because he called to talk on his drive home. I feel like I never get to spend time with him, so when he calls me, I like to be able to talk to him. I don't want to say, “Sorry dear, but I need my beauty sleep.” I mean I could, but I don't feel like I can, or should, or want to.
Today I had to work from home. I felt tired, but forced myself to stay awake. I don't know when my husband will be home tonight, because he was gone by 5am this morning on his way to a job. I sure wish he was bringing in a ton of money for all this work he is doing and all this running himself into the ground and not sleeping.
So, here it is 7pm, I don't have dinner made. My husband doesn't find soup to be a worthy dinner, so I am going to have to figure out something for him. I know… I'll make some mayonnaise and make him some chicken salad with the roasted chicken. I had better hurry and get to that.
I will try to get to bed by 8pm, and I hope I will be able to sleep undisturbed. It is very difficult for me to get a good night's rest when my husband is out all hours of the night.
I feel like I am going to have to give up this effort to sleep only at night, and go back to sleeping when I can. It is just too much of a struggle and too stressful.
Anyway, here is my fun photo to share for the day… today's egg harvest… eight yummy eggs [affiliate link]. We have seventeen new layers, and they are beginning to lay in earnest. If it doesn't get too hot in the next couple weeks, I may get as many as 18 eggs in one day since we still have a few older hens that lay an egg every so often.
I am proud of myself for being a good farmer. I put hay in the nest's for the girls so they would find the nests comfy and baby-worthy.
I hope you had a great day today, and I hope tomorrow is fantastic, too! Hugs, Starlene